Dear Ms California,

Dear Ms California,

I regret to inform you that you are a functional retard. Yes that pretty smile and composed demeanor may help you hide your disability in society, but after only a minute or two of listening to you speak it becomes all too clear that your IQ must be about the same number as your bust size.

For all of you that haven’t been following this story, Carrie Prejean (Ms California), lost the Ms USA pageant thanks to answering a question on gay marriage from Perez Hilton. She lost because in what can only be described as an incoherent rant tempered with moments of shear retardation she proclaimed the sanctity of marriage being only between a man and a woman. NEWSFLASH….the only people that watch beauty pageants are gay men and mid west mothers with 1980’s hair and a matching bedazzled jacket and jean combo. You just offended your base and you couldn’t even do it with some semblance of tact or intelligence.

Let me clue you in to something Ms Prejean. This world has no real sense of priority, because if it did then you would never be given a platform to speak and express your moronic and half baked views on morality and politics. But thankfully for you this world does give that platform to people with a beautiful face and flawless body, but just remember this. Every time you open your mouth and say something, the only reason you are allowed to do so is because the media and the people that bank roll you just are just men who respect nothing more than their goal to exploit and if possible have sex with you.

Oh, and one last thought. You know all those super nice guys that do your hair and makeup and seem so nice to you. They are gay, and now they hate your functionally retarded yet very well maintained ass.

No Strings Attached

So here is something not everyone knows about me but don’t mind sharing. I have been using online dating for years with varied success and there is something that I see all the time that always gets me thinking. NSA, no strings attached is something you see very often online and it always makes me chuckle a little and at the same time makes me sad. You see the idea of no strings attached is a logical fallacy and its one that permeates our society as a whole. NEWSFLASH, nothing in this life comes without strings or as I like to call them, consequences.

Let’s stop calling them strings, it sounds pleasant, and that’s the idea, lets remove the comforting notion of consequences as delicate strings binding us together and acknowledge what they are. Everything we do on a daily basis comes with consequences, whether it is the way we deal with people, the way we choose to spend money, the food we eat, the car we drive, it all has an effect on others in ways we do not always perceive in our immediate lives. The reason I chose to write about consequences is because I feel as a society we try to insulate ourselves from the responsibility of the consequences originating from our actions. We hide behind the notion that if we set out to do something with “no strings attached” that we have given enough of a disclaimer that the resulting fallout is not our problem. Hell, the entire sub-prime lending failure can be seen as an NSA arrangement where the initial sale was full of hidden strings unseen to the participants but which eventually rose to the surface and entangled everyone involved….including those not involved.

Dating is no different but provides an excellent example psychologically of our inability to see the hidden “strings” we create whether we like it or not. The truly disturbing part of all of this isn’t the fact that people cant see the resulting damage caused by the consequences of their actions, but the fact that they were seeking a consequence free reality in the first place. Why is it that our society revels in the idea of a “never-never land” existence in which actions have no lasting consequence, we do not age, and no one has to make adult decisions. At what point did we start idolizing the life of small children and their udder lack of responsibility.

I wish for one day our society would stand up and say, “I am an adult and will make decisions with consequences, some right and some wrong, but will accept the results of those decisions and their consequence.” I want to hear everyone in LA say these words and actually think about what that means because I genuinely don’t think at present, the people where I live have any idea of this concept.

The bottom line is, if you or someone you know thinks that NSA is a viable way of doing business, dating, conducting yourself with friends, or just about anything else in life, pass this simple message along for me…GROW UP

Faux News Leads a Faux Revolution

Ok so for anyone who pays attention to the cable news cycles knows, Fox News is organizing Tea Parties all around the country to drum up support for their anti taxation movement. This might be the most ironic thing I have ever seen come out of the right wing of this country. I am going to address this irony in two parts.

First things first, the American Republican party is the party of the corporation and privatization. If you don’t believe this or feel this is a misnomer, you are an idiot and need to walk around with a bag on your head so the rest of society can mock you for being the moron you are. So with that said lets talk a little about the original Boston Tea Party. Being from Boston and being a history buff I know a little bit about the subject. Let’s take a trip back down memory lane and take a look at that moment in American history that the right wing has decided to co-op for their own benefit. The Boston Tea Party was an act of rebellion, not against the crown, but against the British East India Company which controlled the crown similar to the way major multinationals have seized control over our current government. The mantra of taxation without representation is clever but really doesn’t tell the whole story. The driving motives for the Boston Tea Party was not just the slightly raised taxes decreed by the crown, it was the complete removal of taxation for the colonies main competitor in the form of the British East India Company. If you sell tea and are forced to pay 10% tax on your profits, you might be ok with that, but not if your competitor is allowed to pay 0%, which is exactly what happened. Secondly, the Boston Tea Party was what would be considered today an act of terrorism since adjusted for inflation the colonists destroyed 1.5 million dollars worth of tea. So the idea that the republican party, the party of the multinational corporation, would hold symbolic tea parties to protest taxation against the rich is simply hilarious, and makes me wish people would study history and not update their twitter about that awesome sandwich you just had that no one should care about.

The second point of irony is that the republican are trying to position themselves as the populist party now since their base is becoming disenfranchised. Let me get this straight. The all white, southern conservative, xenophobic, bigoted, born again Christians are now the populists? Hold on I have to change my pants since I just shit them laughing at this notion. I don’t even know what to say about this except, NO. You are not the populists. You represent the wealthy and their interests and you do it from accumulate power granted to you by religious intolerance, bigotry and a poor white underclass that has voted against its own best interests for 60 years. You want to represent the people, you can start by making amends for the damage you have done since Reagan by eating a nice heaping helping of GO FUCK YOURSELF, and letting real conservatives like Ron Paul lead your party. I don’t even agree with Ron Paul, but at least he is an honest politician who cares about his country more than his corporations.